Surviving Our First Deployment 2009-2010 Part 2

I don't know how many parts this "note jotting" will take, because the more I think about it, the more I have to say about it. So now I will continue writing until I get tired of hearing my own voice in my head.

I want to talk about some of my personal challenges/goals/opportunities I had over the last several months. The first 3 months my goal was to make it through P90X. And thinking back to that, it seems like a really long time ago. I did really well the first month and a half. The last month and a half was pretty hard because by that time I was working and getting tired of the same workouts. I didn't have the amazing results you see advertised, but I did feel so much better and stronger. I went from doing 0 pull ups to 2. And for that I am proud of myself.

I started working at the temp agency and had to find my way around and island that was completely foreign to me. I had to figure out the bus system. And on weekends when I was in Waikiki, I had to get lost about 189456 times before I finally bought a GPS. It sucks when you have no idea where you are going, and nobody to call. But I finally feel like I can find my way around after being here for almost a year. Reason it's difficult to get around? The road names are Hawaiian names (most of them sound the same to me). You have to go on all these back roads to get to certain highways. And just because the highway has an exit at a certain place doesn't necessarily mean it's going to have an on ramp at that same place. And when it gets dark, I can't see where the ocean or mountains are, and I lose all sense of direction.

I had opportunities to travel. California for a month and Georgia for a month. I don't think I would've made those trips had Spencer been here. I've already written plenty of details about both trips, so I'll spare you those details this time around. You can read about it here, here, here and here.But I am very grateful for friends and family that hosted me for such long periods of times. Seriously, those 2 months helped out immensely.

I took on all of Spencer's responsibilities. I was not really looking forward to this part. There are things that I just don't like to do. Like take out the trash. That is Spencer's job. And any car issues. Spencer's. When stressful situations come up, I usually just emotionally collapse and let Spencer deal with it. He is the problem solver in our relationship. So when I get the letter from the IRS saying that we owed them nearly $2500 from 2007, I just wanted to give up. I wanted to ignore the situation. Play dead and see if the situation would just fix itself. But obviously that would not help the matter. After doing a lot of research (and complaining), I finally found out there were some errors, wrote the IRS, and got it lowered to $700. Not bad. It was a pain, but I guess it is just part of being an adult. I ended up selling Spencer's car (with his consent) by myself, and had to get my car's registration renewed. The registration sounds simple, but when you are trying to get out of a $200 weight tax for Hawaii, and your Power of Attorney is slightly flawed, it becomes quite a complicated situation (thank you again Gary and Denise for being willing to help so last minute). I dealt with water leaks, broken ice machines, computer problems, and cockroaches(thankfully we are renting, so none of those expenses were out of our pocket). I paid all the bills. On time. I dealt with any issues our tenants in Covington had (which were not very many...so happy to have good tenants...finally!). I did all the cooking, cleaning, and laundry (which I realize is not bad when it's only for myself). And I'm not sure why I'm using parenthesis in every single sentence. Forgive me.

We definitely had a great opportunity to save some money. I had opportunities to explore the island. My friend Jen and I have covered most of the main beaches already. I had opportunities to challenge myself, meet new people, try new foods, and experience a completely new and different culture. I challenged myself by signing up for an 8 mile race when I have never run 8 miles before. But I trained for several weeks and made it through the race in a decent time. I made it to church by myself every single Sunday (almost). And on time (most of the time).

A lot of people have told me "I could never do what you are doing". Well, 3 years ago I would've said the exact same thing. I never saw this coming. But when Spencer decided this is what he wanted, and convinced me that he felt right about it and it was a smart decision for his future, I agreed. I called up my cousin who was married to a military man and got her take on military life. She told me that she handled deployments alright because she was independent. She got married a little older, and already had a life she was living. She had a house, a good job, and got by on her own. So once she was married, and he was deployed, she just reverted back to her life before marriage, and she was fine. Maybe it's the competitive spirit in me, but after I had talked to her, I thought to myself if she can do it, so can I! So I took on that mindset. I had never been independent in my LIFE before. Even at college, I wouldn't leave my apartment unless I had at least asked someone to go with me. I was always counting on a friend or family member to support me. So this deployment was a huge challenge for me to see if I had the capability to be independent. I've come to the conclusion that being independent is quite fun. I get to watch tv whenever I want, go out whenever I want, sleep in whenever I want, and not ever have to worry about what anybody else is thinking. Don't get me wrong, I still prefer a life with Spencer than without him, but I have learned how to at least enjoy life on my own. I feel like it's been a great character building experience for me to really push myself and at least try to be the person I've wanted to become, with no outside influence.

And now I am tired of talking about myself. Again, this is for documenting. Still more to come. Next one is all about Spencer.