I had been looking forward to last Wednesday since I found out I was having triplets. Last Wednesday was my 24 week milestone, which meant anytime after that day, the babies were considered viable and had a chance at surviving outside the womb.
Well, Wednesday came, and I had my weekly appointment. Before we get into that, let me backtrack a little. Knowing that we were nearing a time when the babies could come, I probably did a little too much the previous days. I wanted to live it up a little before the crazy began. Saturday night we went out to dinner with one of Spencer's mission friends. Sunday I went to an hour of church, then that night we drove down to do a nice little scenic sunset walk. Monday I went to the beach with some friends, and Tuesday we made a Costco run. And another backup point. My father in law is here to help. He came a few weeks ago, and is staying until the babies are born. He has been a LIFE SAVER already. He cleans, does laundry, cooks, and entertains Eleanor. Seriously, my life(and house) would be a disaster at this point without him. He came with me on all these outings, which helped, but still, I was leaving the house too much.
Ok, back to the appointment. We did the usual ultrasound. All the babies looked good. They check the heartbeat, fluid, bladder, and lastly, they do a cervical length measurement. This is where they got concerned. It had shortened from the previous week, even though it wasn't a scary short, they thought it was at least concerning. While they were measuring it, they asked if I was having a contraction. I didn't feel a thing, so I told them I didn't think so. They told me they were going to admit me and keep me for a few days for monitoring. While I agreed that it was the smart thing to do, I was supposed to go get a massage immediately after my appointment, AND my birthday was the next day. What a way to bring in my 30's.
They put a monitor on my belly to track all the contractions. Apparently they were coming every 3-4 minutes. I only felt about every 5th contraction, and even those didn't hurt. I could just tell an obvious tightening of my stomach. The staff got very concerned at this point and put an IV in. They had me on magnesium to stop the contractions. That stuff was terrible. Literally felt like my blood was on fire. And they didn't want me eating or drinking while on it. So now I'm hungry and on fire. They gave me a steroid shot to help the babies lungs develop if they were to be born in the next few days. That sucker hurt!
One of the doctors comes up and literally one of the first questions out of his mouth was this: "If one of your babies is in distress, do you want to deliver all 3 to give that baby a fighting chance, or do you want to let that one go to give the other 2 a better chance?"
Wasn't expecting that one. I literally wanted to just say, "Hold on, let me ask my mom. I'm not old enough to be making decisions like these". But I didn't, and told him I'd like to talk to my husband about it. After that doctor left, I had at least 2 other people ask me the same question within an hour or so. They had the NICU doctor come up and tell me everything that could possibly go wrong with the babies if they were born that day(or week) starting from their head, down to their toes. While it sounds overwhelming, the whole time everybody was coming in and out and asking all these scary questions, I was feeling really calm about it. I knew I wasn't going to be having these babies that day(or that week for that matter). I knew these weren't the same type of contractions I had when I went into labor with Eleanor. The doctors were going off those silly contractions, which is their job, and which is why they were way more concerned than I was. I did sometimes get scared when I thought about what would happen if the contractions DID turn into labor contractions, but luckily that never happened.
I started begging for food, because at this point it was about 5:00, and I hadn't eaten since breakfast. And, well, I'm carrying THREE WHOLE BABIES. They finally brought dinner, and what do you know, the contractions started slowing down after that. Spencer, Eleanor, and Gary came to visit, and once they came, contractions basically stopped. Eleanor was a little confused. I think she knew something was wrong, because she was very lovey on me. She kept trying to snuggle in with me and tell me to go to sleep, and then she would close her eyes and try to go to sleep. It was so cute and so sad. When it was time for her to leave, she had the most heartbreaking cry. I knew at that point it would be really hard if I had to be admitted long term.
I stayed in L&D for the night. It was miserable. The bed was uncomfortable. I had a hard time going to sleep on the magnesium. They came in at 1am to unhook me from the magnesium, then again at 2am to take out the catheter. After that, it took me another hour - 2 hours to go to sleep. Then they were back at 6am. They did another cervical length check, and my cervix had remained the same and stable, even after all the contractions the previous day. That was great news. That's actually all they care about. They say I can contract all I want, and as long as my cervix isn't changing, I am good to go. So, I was thinking maybe I'd get to go home soon. Nurses thought the same thing. But no. The doctor on call had a different plan, and told me he wanted me to stay until delivery. Booooo.
I stayed one more night in L&D. I had high hopes of getting better sleep since I wasn't hooked up to anything. Midnight came, and I had a knock at my door, and a nurse to come take my vitals. I turned all diva on her and asked why she was there, and was this really necessary. I need to sleep! Taking vitals doesn't take long, but once I'm awake, I have to use the bathroom, and then it takes a while to get comfortable, and then the babies are awake and having a dance party in my belly. Once morning came, and the doctors came to check on me, I told them I really didn't want anyone disturbing me at night. I also asked to get the IV needle taken out of my arm since they hadn't used it since the first day. They say they keep it in as a precaution. But seriously, that thing was annoying and sore. Such a princess I am.
Made my way down to my new, long term room. It had 2 beds and a nice view. The bed was way more comfortable than the one upstairs. Ok, I'm getting tired of typing, and most of the details to follow are boring. So let's wrap this up. The girl in the room next to me was also expecting triplets, and admitted until she delivered. I went and introduced myself and had a good long talk with her. She is only a week ahead of me, and had been in the hospital for 2 weeks already for the same reasons as me. She was already sick and tired of being there, and desperate for some fresh air. It was good for me to get an idea of what a long hospital stay can do to a person.
Once Saturday came, a new doctor was on call. I've always liked this one way better than the one who was in charge during the week. He comes in to my room and gets straight to the point. He said there is no evidence that being hospitalized prevents pre term labor. There's no difference in laying in my hospital bed as opposed to my own bed at home. As long as I knew what signs to look for that could potentially be pre term labor, and to come to the hospital ASAP if I experienced any of those signs, I was free to go home! He also said he didn't want me laying in bed ALL DAY LONG, because that puts me at risk for blood clots and muscle atrophy, but I still need to take it easy. No cooking, cleaning, carrying Eleanor, etc. And if I do go out, I have to use my wheel chair. I packed my bags as fast as I could and told Spencer to come get me! We did do one last cervical length check, and my cervix was still the same, so I was on my way home.
So now for the good and the bad. The good. There is comfort in knowing that if anything happened, I was already at the hospital, and I could get immediate care if needed. Call me crazy, but I also liked the food. I liked knowing I was getting plenty of calories, with a good balance of proteins and veggies. And really, it didn't taste bad to me at all. I liked having all that food without having to put a single ounce of cooking or preparation into it. I liked getting to know the doctors and nurses. They were all so sweet - especially on my birthday where they made me signs and brought goodies. I loved that hospital bed. Getting in and out was so much easier than my bed at home. I loved being able to adjust the back at night to give myself a nice incline. I liked being able to take showers and talk on the phone and take naps without being interrupted by my 2 year old. I missed her like crazy every other second, but it was nice to have a little rest and relaxation. Another good thing I am beyond grateful for is that I don't have to worry about money with any of this. I'm at a military hospital(a very very nice one), so all costs are covered. I can't help but think that I would be stressing out so much more if I had to think about paying for the hospital stay. I can't imagine the worry some parents go through if they didn't have good insurance(or none at all) and had to add financial stress to this situation.
The bad. I missed Eleanor like crazy. She came to visit every day, and every night she had to leave, she left with tears streaming down her terribly sad face. I would not be able to handle that for 2 months. It was hard for this mama to handle. Once I got home, I was SO happy to be woken up by a very happy 2 year old jumping on me and saying "HI MAMA!" as opposed to a doctor or nurse who just wants to ask a few questions. No wifi. Seriously! What hospital doesn't have wifi? Luckily I had my phone, so I did have some access to the outside world, but that was kind of a game changer for me. Every time I tried to take a nap, it seemed another doctor or nurse was coming in for one reason or another. We had to do Non Stress Tests every day. Basically they put one monitor for each baby on my belly to track their heart rate. They have to strap it on to stay for at least 21 minutes. If one baby gets off the monitor for more than a minute, they have to restart the entire 21 minutes. This became kind of stressful everyday because my babies are very very active. I actually don't think they ever got 21 minutes straight with all three babies, but every NST ended with a "that will have to be good enough" from the nurse. Overall, the NST would take at least an hour every day. Knowing that you don't even have the option to go outside is a tough pill to swallow. To be cramped up in a hospital room for a long amount of time can get to be quite depressing, so I am so happy to have only stayed a few days, and not a few months.
Now what? I still go in every week for my appointments. There is still a chance I could go in this week and get admitted again. It could happen at any time. So I'll just be grateful for every day that I get to come back home.
I'll be 25 weeks tomorrow. The next big goal is 28 weeks - when the survivability goes way up for the babies. Then the next goals will be 30, 32, and 34 weeks. I'd love to make it to 34 weeks - that is golden. But for now, every day these babies stay inside is something to be proud of.
Well, Wednesday came, and I had my weekly appointment. Before we get into that, let me backtrack a little. Knowing that we were nearing a time when the babies could come, I probably did a little too much the previous days. I wanted to live it up a little before the crazy began. Saturday night we went out to dinner with one of Spencer's mission friends. Sunday I went to an hour of church, then that night we drove down to do a nice little scenic sunset walk. Monday I went to the beach with some friends, and Tuesday we made a Costco run. And another backup point. My father in law is here to help. He came a few weeks ago, and is staying until the babies are born. He has been a LIFE SAVER already. He cleans, does laundry, cooks, and entertains Eleanor. Seriously, my life(and house) would be a disaster at this point without him. He came with me on all these outings, which helped, but still, I was leaving the house too much.
Ok, back to the appointment. We did the usual ultrasound. All the babies looked good. They check the heartbeat, fluid, bladder, and lastly, they do a cervical length measurement. This is where they got concerned. It had shortened from the previous week, even though it wasn't a scary short, they thought it was at least concerning. While they were measuring it, they asked if I was having a contraction. I didn't feel a thing, so I told them I didn't think so. They told me they were going to admit me and keep me for a few days for monitoring. While I agreed that it was the smart thing to do, I was supposed to go get a massage immediately after my appointment, AND my birthday was the next day. What a way to bring in my 30's.
They put a monitor on my belly to track all the contractions. Apparently they were coming every 3-4 minutes. I only felt about every 5th contraction, and even those didn't hurt. I could just tell an obvious tightening of my stomach. The staff got very concerned at this point and put an IV in. They had me on magnesium to stop the contractions. That stuff was terrible. Literally felt like my blood was on fire. And they didn't want me eating or drinking while on it. So now I'm hungry and on fire. They gave me a steroid shot to help the babies lungs develop if they were to be born in the next few days. That sucker hurt!
One of the doctors comes up and literally one of the first questions out of his mouth was this: "If one of your babies is in distress, do you want to deliver all 3 to give that baby a fighting chance, or do you want to let that one go to give the other 2 a better chance?"
Wasn't expecting that one. I literally wanted to just say, "Hold on, let me ask my mom. I'm not old enough to be making decisions like these". But I didn't, and told him I'd like to talk to my husband about it. After that doctor left, I had at least 2 other people ask me the same question within an hour or so. They had the NICU doctor come up and tell me everything that could possibly go wrong with the babies if they were born that day(or week) starting from their head, down to their toes. While it sounds overwhelming, the whole time everybody was coming in and out and asking all these scary questions, I was feeling really calm about it. I knew I wasn't going to be having these babies that day(or that week for that matter). I knew these weren't the same type of contractions I had when I went into labor with Eleanor. The doctors were going off those silly contractions, which is their job, and which is why they were way more concerned than I was. I did sometimes get scared when I thought about what would happen if the contractions DID turn into labor contractions, but luckily that never happened.
I started begging for food, because at this point it was about 5:00, and I hadn't eaten since breakfast. And, well, I'm carrying THREE WHOLE BABIES. They finally brought dinner, and what do you know, the contractions started slowing down after that. Spencer, Eleanor, and Gary came to visit, and once they came, contractions basically stopped. Eleanor was a little confused. I think she knew something was wrong, because she was very lovey on me. She kept trying to snuggle in with me and tell me to go to sleep, and then she would close her eyes and try to go to sleep. It was so cute and so sad. When it was time for her to leave, she had the most heartbreaking cry. I knew at that point it would be really hard if I had to be admitted long term.
I stayed in L&D for the night. It was miserable. The bed was uncomfortable. I had a hard time going to sleep on the magnesium. They came in at 1am to unhook me from the magnesium, then again at 2am to take out the catheter. After that, it took me another hour - 2 hours to go to sleep. Then they were back at 6am. They did another cervical length check, and my cervix had remained the same and stable, even after all the contractions the previous day. That was great news. That's actually all they care about. They say I can contract all I want, and as long as my cervix isn't changing, I am good to go. So, I was thinking maybe I'd get to go home soon. Nurses thought the same thing. But no. The doctor on call had a different plan, and told me he wanted me to stay until delivery. Booooo.
I stayed one more night in L&D. I had high hopes of getting better sleep since I wasn't hooked up to anything. Midnight came, and I had a knock at my door, and a nurse to come take my vitals. I turned all diva on her and asked why she was there, and was this really necessary. I need to sleep! Taking vitals doesn't take long, but once I'm awake, I have to use the bathroom, and then it takes a while to get comfortable, and then the babies are awake and having a dance party in my belly. Once morning came, and the doctors came to check on me, I told them I really didn't want anyone disturbing me at night. I also asked to get the IV needle taken out of my arm since they hadn't used it since the first day. They say they keep it in as a precaution. But seriously, that thing was annoying and sore. Such a princess I am.
Made my way down to my new, long term room. It had 2 beds and a nice view. The bed was way more comfortable than the one upstairs. Ok, I'm getting tired of typing, and most of the details to follow are boring. So let's wrap this up. The girl in the room next to me was also expecting triplets, and admitted until she delivered. I went and introduced myself and had a good long talk with her. She is only a week ahead of me, and had been in the hospital for 2 weeks already for the same reasons as me. She was already sick and tired of being there, and desperate for some fresh air. It was good for me to get an idea of what a long hospital stay can do to a person.
Once Saturday came, a new doctor was on call. I've always liked this one way better than the one who was in charge during the week. He comes in to my room and gets straight to the point. He said there is no evidence that being hospitalized prevents pre term labor. There's no difference in laying in my hospital bed as opposed to my own bed at home. As long as I knew what signs to look for that could potentially be pre term labor, and to come to the hospital ASAP if I experienced any of those signs, I was free to go home! He also said he didn't want me laying in bed ALL DAY LONG, because that puts me at risk for blood clots and muscle atrophy, but I still need to take it easy. No cooking, cleaning, carrying Eleanor, etc. And if I do go out, I have to use my wheel chair. I packed my bags as fast as I could and told Spencer to come get me! We did do one last cervical length check, and my cervix was still the same, so I was on my way home.
So now for the good and the bad. The good. There is comfort in knowing that if anything happened, I was already at the hospital, and I could get immediate care if needed. Call me crazy, but I also liked the food. I liked knowing I was getting plenty of calories, with a good balance of proteins and veggies. And really, it didn't taste bad to me at all. I liked having all that food without having to put a single ounce of cooking or preparation into it. I liked getting to know the doctors and nurses. They were all so sweet - especially on my birthday where they made me signs and brought goodies. I loved that hospital bed. Getting in and out was so much easier than my bed at home. I loved being able to adjust the back at night to give myself a nice incline. I liked being able to take showers and talk on the phone and take naps without being interrupted by my 2 year old. I missed her like crazy every other second, but it was nice to have a little rest and relaxation. Another good thing I am beyond grateful for is that I don't have to worry about money with any of this. I'm at a military hospital(a very very nice one), so all costs are covered. I can't help but think that I would be stressing out so much more if I had to think about paying for the hospital stay. I can't imagine the worry some parents go through if they didn't have good insurance(or none at all) and had to add financial stress to this situation.
The bad. I missed Eleanor like crazy. She came to visit every day, and every night she had to leave, she left with tears streaming down her terribly sad face. I would not be able to handle that for 2 months. It was hard for this mama to handle. Once I got home, I was SO happy to be woken up by a very happy 2 year old jumping on me and saying "HI MAMA!" as opposed to a doctor or nurse who just wants to ask a few questions. No wifi. Seriously! What hospital doesn't have wifi? Luckily I had my phone, so I did have some access to the outside world, but that was kind of a game changer for me. Every time I tried to take a nap, it seemed another doctor or nurse was coming in for one reason or another. We had to do Non Stress Tests every day. Basically they put one monitor for each baby on my belly to track their heart rate. They have to strap it on to stay for at least 21 minutes. If one baby gets off the monitor for more than a minute, they have to restart the entire 21 minutes. This became kind of stressful everyday because my babies are very very active. I actually don't think they ever got 21 minutes straight with all three babies, but every NST ended with a "that will have to be good enough" from the nurse. Overall, the NST would take at least an hour every day. Knowing that you don't even have the option to go outside is a tough pill to swallow. To be cramped up in a hospital room for a long amount of time can get to be quite depressing, so I am so happy to have only stayed a few days, and not a few months.
Now what? I still go in every week for my appointments. There is still a chance I could go in this week and get admitted again. It could happen at any time. So I'll just be grateful for every day that I get to come back home.
I'll be 25 weeks tomorrow. The next big goal is 28 weeks - when the survivability goes way up for the babies. Then the next goals will be 30, 32, and 34 weeks. I'd love to make it to 34 weeks - that is golden. But for now, every day these babies stay inside is something to be proud of.
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| Admit Day |
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| Breakfast in bed on my birthday. |
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| View from my room. |
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| 24 weeks, about to go home. |
3 comments:
Thanks for sharing! It would have not done any good to ask your mama that very hard question! I would never make a decision for you like that! I would be supportive for whatever you decided! I am like you and feel confident everything will be fine. Love you tons!
Hey! Just thought I'd let you know that I'm following your posts here and am rooting for you! I stay pretty quiet on FB and blogs but I just had to tell you how many emotions this post stirred up for me. I know that having twins doesn't even compare to triplets, but I can relate to so much of what you're going through. I had to stay 6 hours in the hospital for those tightening contractions at 24 weeks....Those late night dance parties...oh man....The roller coaster ride that that doctors put you through, making you worry about unnecessary things that might happen....And the discomfort! Trying to get comfortable at night was the worst!!! I can't wait to hear the rest of your story. I'm so happy for you and my thoughts are with you.
I loved this story. It's so crazy when you told me only a few months ago you were having triplets it would all go so fast!! I'm SO glad you got to go home, because it's going to be crazy enough having 3 babies and spending time with Eleanor, but to have to spend 2 months away from her now would be torture! Hang in there!
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